Posted in Book Writing, Buddhism, Hope & Inspiration, Meditation, Writing

I Am Breathing…thanks for the reminder

As usual, what I lovingly refer to as my “Spiritual ADD” was in full effect this morning as I picked up another book to look through, looking for inspiration as I write my own book. (I have at least six books in front of me at the moment).  Picking up one of my go-to books when I’m lost, Mindfulness for Beginners by Jon Kabat-Zinn, I got to page 13 and just started giggling away.

The title of this chapter, “Who is Breathing” starts with…

Of course you are breathing.
But let’s face it. If it were really up to you to keep the breath going, you would have died long ago. You would have gotten distracted by this or that, sooner or later…and whoops, dead.

I love it….”whoops, dead.”  It was a great conk on the head this morning that my focus has been off lately. I’ve allowed too many distractions to affect me, finding one excuse after another. I’ve even forgotten to breathe intentionally. Just stop and breathe.

A focus in my life is helping others to feel better; be it spiritually, emotionally and/or physically. I teach that it all starts with the breath. It seems the teacher needed some refresher instruction. The answer arrived perfectly.

I love how divinely answers arrive, just when we need them. The key is being open to seeing and hearing them when they do arrive. So thank you Master Kabat-Zinn, your message got through to me today, and I Am Breathing.

Posted in Hope & Inspiration

Writing and Living with Pain while being Superwoman

Sitting down to write about how to get through pain while you are in pain is an interesting conundrum, especially when the time spent sitting is counterproductive to your well-being. What are my choices?

1) Stop writing….fat chance of that happening!

2) Write while standing up….I suppose, although that would involve a new location to write, and I’ve already determined my writing habits go to hell when I’m not in my “writing room”

3) Stretch and move frequently…yes, I do that which then de-volves to the five loads of laundry and two loads of dishes I’ve done today so far. 

4) Take drugs…been there, done that….not doing that anymore unless I’m dying.

5) Lay down on the bed for a few minutes…won’t happen alone because the cats will come out of their comas sensing my body available to them to climb all over…kind of how they know there is a basket of clean laundry unsupervised.

For some reason, I can’t seem to just get up and stretch/move for five minutes “just because.” Perhaps it is the Capricorn anal-retentive part of me that is always trying to keep up with eight zillion tasks. Being super-woman; super-writer; super-photographer; super-blogger; super-kitteh-momma; and super-wife, all are on my mind.  Hmmmm….what am I doing wrong she asks herself? 

Perhaps part of the challenge is writing with a helper on my lap? Thelma is my writing assistant, always here…

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The kitties provide me with a ton of comfort, physically and emotionally. They don’t give me the answers I’m looking for….

What can I say to help someone who feels like I do?

What can I do to help someone in pain?

How can I demonstrate my ability to use the powers of the universe to focus, when I’m zippidee-do-dahing all over myself?

Maybe the answer is to just keep going. Keep trying, keep looking for answers, and take off the superwoman cape. It really isn’t winning me any thing other than a little extra pain that I don’t need. So I’m hanging up my cape for the day, sitting quietly with my kitty and focusing on my writing. 

I’d love to know if you have any secrets that you’d like to share on how you get through and balance. Please reply below!!

 

Posted in Crohn's Disease, Crohns, Hope & Inspiration, IBD

WTF God….Bowel Disease???

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When I first got sick and heard the words “You have Ulcerative Colitis” my reaction could have been “WTF God?” Unfortunately, the cool acronyms we live with now, and take for granted, weren’t around yet in 1989. So instead, it was mostly “can you say that again, slowly” simply because the words Ulcerative Colitis were just unpronounceable at first; and unfathomable to my 19 year old brain. Little did I know what the next decade would bring – surgeries, pain, Ankylosing Spondylitis, kidney stones, and a new diagnosis: Crohn’s Disease. I guess all those years I was thankful it wasn’t Crohn’s bit me in the ass – literally. Never wish for something to not happen…the universe just doesn’t work like that!

Today the Crohn’s & Colitis Foundation of America kicks off a week of awareness of this disease that I share with 1 in 200 people. And to think that 70,000 new people every year get diagnosed is mind-boggling. Yet no one talks about this in the main stream, why? Well because it’s just not sexy to talk about a pooping disease!   Continue reading “WTF God….Bowel Disease???”

Posted in Book Writing, Hope & Inspiration, Writing

My love affair with Suzy

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Good ole’ Suzy Q.        Thank you to http://www.listenupjuniper.blogspot.com for the photo

As I think back on one guilty pleasure that gets my salivary glands leaking, it would have to be my love affair with Suzy. That would be SuzyQ of the Hostess family of products.

Oh, the crackle of the plastic as I carefully separated the ends of the wrapping, attempting not to smear any of the succulent white filling along the sides. Delicately retrieving the first rectangular chocolate cake with sinfully sweet white icing in the middle,

I ran my tongue around the edges of the middle, collecting up any stray bits of frosting that could end up on my cheek unbeknownst to me. The first bite from the corner, teeth easily sinking through the top layer of light, airy chocolate cake, followed by frosting, then more cake. My tastebuds danced with expectation, my stomach rejoiced in the dance about to occur. The crinkle of the plastic wrapping as I quickly squished it up to be thrown away…to hide the evidence.

Oh Suzy Q….I loved you so

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Believe it or not, that’s a snippet from my book, from the chapter about living in denial. Denial of my diseases and pain…and how I buried my head. One of those ways was food. So many of us use food for everything except nourishment.

Thankfully my desire for Suzy is long gone…but what a run we had.